Dreams

Honestly, I don't know what I want to be in the future. Yea I know, there's so many choices. What I'm afraid with, I can't handle those works! Sometimes, I don't understand why so many people want to be doctor or engineer... I wanted to be a doctor. But now, I'm blur. I just need the in demand job for my future. I don't want to waste my time studying and in the end, I'll just stay at home or begging people to gimme some monneh. But no, I want to be independent. I'll make my parents proud of me but I just don't know how.

Why I'm still doubt about taking medicine? I've read a few news. They said there are too many doctors in malaysia or most of them being a kuli hospital. Yknow what means by kuli hospital? They are too busy  taking care of patients and meanwhile, some nurses still spending they so called 'ample time' by having a crappy talks. Moreover, most of the um and ukm graduates continue their frickin' life by working at frickin' Singapore hospitals. Am I think too far? No right? Somehow, graduates unemployment scares me a lot. I guess I've watched too many doctor dramas. Such as Royal Pains, The Scrub, Grey's Anatomy and A Gifted Man. But I love dissecting..... I've always wanted to cure people.

I miss this.

Or maybe I should be a veterinar lol.

Guess what? When I was a kid, I wanted to be a scientist. Tryna find a medicine to cure cancer patients. Or a nurse? Because nurse was too nice to me when I was in hospital lol. Sometimes, a fashion designer because I love to draw! It's been two years I didn't draw. Or maybe an architecture? But I hate going to the site. I hate sunny days to be exact. My skin will turn to pinky-red like a pig I tell yaaaa! Hmmm a pilot? Because I love to travel to the whole world but too bad, I'm wearing spectacles...

My so called cancer medicine muahaha

Genetic engineering kinda interesting too. But they're spreading some diseases because of  new inventions.

Basically, I'm truly in love with calculations. I hate reading. I'm not willing to spend the whole day to read the whole book. But I'm willing to face all the formulas, numbers because hey, we got calculators! lol.

I guess I have to do solat istikharah. There's nothing else I can do. Soon, the SPM result will be out on 20th March (yup, a day before my friggin' birthday!). Don't search for me. Lol just kidding. Wish me luck!

xxx